Most women scammers are simply after money. They don’t usually tend to be terribly sophisticated about it either. Only the most brazen internet dating scammers will directly ask you to send them money. Most will simply tell you a sad story then hope you’ll offer to send them money to sort out their problems. You are strongly advised NOT to send money, as sending $10 is on the slippery slope to sending $100, and then $1000. There are some online dating sites that ban men for sending money to women they have listed. If men did not send money to women then there wouldn’t be nearly so much dating fraud occurring.

A variant of the sending money scam is an advanced fee fraud. Nigerian scammers love this type of scam. Usually it involves a man or woman making travel plans to meet you. Only the travel plans will go wrong and the other person will ask you for money to sort it out. Airline tickets, excess baggage, custom charges, visa applications and other travel related items are popular topics for these types of stories.

At this point it’s worth mentioning that men and women from developing countries in general CANNOT get a visa to travel to your country. So if a Costa Rica, Colombian or other Latin American woman says they will come and visit you then be very suspicious indeed. A possible exception could be made for wealthy ladies who have previously traveled to your country, but these aren’t generally the types of lady you’ll come across in the search for a mail order bride.

Other common scams are ladies acting as affiliates of other websites. I’ve personally been contacted by Colombian ladies who have wanted me to chat on another more expensive dating site. Many ladies (particularly Colombians) also tout for business for webcam chat room sites they’re affiliates of. Again, just avoid these members altogether.

There is some evidence that some internet dating scammers are interested in identity theft or putting malware on your computer. Always be careful of telling dating site members too much about yourself, and don’t send them photos of yourself or your families until you get to know them quite well. If you’re using dating sites it’s also essential to pay attention to computer security and keep your computer up to date. There’s some evidence of viruses being spread using chat software like MSN, Skype and QQ, so be wary of accepting downloaded files from people you meet on dating sites.

It’s also worth bearing in mind that scammers are often in the “too good to be true” category of dating site member. So if you’re contacted by a sexy 20 year old Colombian girl then take a reality check. If you met them in the street would they give you a second glance?

Bear in mind that scammers usually use stolen photos which they’ve got from Facebook, Flickr or another dating site. Of the scammers I’ve seen, I’d say that the ladies were mostly girls in their 20′s to 30′s. They were usually cute looking. Invariably they would contact my clients first, and would often tell my clients their email address in their first email. All of these are big red flags, so be cautious.

So internet dating can be a great way to find some love in your life. However, it’s essential to be on the lookout for online dating scams. Dating scammers operate on all dating sites, so never let your guard down if you want to find love online. If you are using such a site and have questions concerning the site or the activities of your lady friend please feel free to contact me for more information.

"Hi, my name is Bill and I live in California. I have been coming to Costa Rica for the past 7 years and last year I met a woman there and we hit it off pretty good and I have been seeing no one else but her. Her name is Johanna, she is 30 and I am 59. She is Colombian and I met her at one of the local hotel/casinos. I know when I met her she was a working girl, but since we have been together she has been staying home because I am supporting her. She is attending English classes and taking other courses in the local university. Whenever I call her she usually answers the phone regardless of when I call. However, recently on certain nights I lose total communication with her. When I challenger her about it she tells me her battery was dead, or the ICE system was down or the weather effected transmission. I just get this gut feeling that she is doing something while I am not there. I come to Costa Rica every 3 or 4 months. I would like to know what she is doing when I am not there just to ease this queasiness I have in my stomach, what can I do to find out?"

Most inquires I get like this are from men who either live in the United States or Canada and are accustomed to retaining the services of a private investigator for a nominal amount of money to "spy" on their girlfriends or wives. Even their surveillance can be time consuming and expensive. Surveillance is always expensive but more so here.

First, there are no street addresses. very few men who make this type of inquiry have any clue where these women live. I usually get responses like "I've been there once but I don't remember how to get there. She usually stays with me at my hotel." Therefore the first thing that I must do is find out where she lives and this can be a real challenge. This usually requires substantial information about the target to take to the national registry and track her down by addresses she has listed as hers as well as her parents or places of employment. Alternatively, we have to watch the local haunts and spot her then follow her to her destination. People who are subjects of a surveillance are not very accommodating or considerate of your time or your wallet. They do not appear on "cue" and therefore surveillance requires patience and perseverance.

Second, once located and identified you have to be in the right spot at the right time in order to capture the activity. Once again this requires time and patience, during which the clock is running and the money is flowing.

Thirdly, following people here is challenging due to the complete disregard for following traffic regulations. Most of these women utilize taxi's and generally use the same driver for their activities. Many of the taxi drivers are quasi pimps for these women and arrange for them to meet clients away from the usual haunts.

Fourthly, it is impossible to get video of these women in a hotel room with a man. It's not going to happen. Videos will show the man and the woman at a bar or a hotel and them leaving for a room or for another venue to consummate the deal. Many clients want proof positive. With this in mind the video proof has to be viewed in its totality to come to a conclusion. My clients need to ask themselves, " What conclusion would an objective independent person who viewed the video come to?" Remember, if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and swims like a duck, IT IS A DUCK!!!!

Regrettably, the majority of these investigations leave my clients emotionally bankrupt as well as losing substantial financial resources. 

How can you keep it safe while you find love online and off? The key factor is to use common sense!

Here are a few common-sense reminders to follow to get you started.

1. Keep your personal information private until you feel comfortable. This means phone numbers and private email addresses and your full name. And never give out your home address until you’ve met a new match in person a few times. Almost all dating sites give you an anonymous email account which you can use to correspond with your matches, so this should be easy.

2. Create a free email account specifically for online dating. When you are ready to give potential matches your private email address, create a free account that you can use specifically for online dating. Yahoo, gmail, mac and AOL all provide free email addresses. Using a new personal dating email address will allow you to keep your regular email anonymous if a relationship doesn’t work out. When you do create a free internet dating email address, remember not to use your full name as part of the address.

3. Use a cell phone instead of your home phone when you do give out your phone number. This will allow you to keep your home phone number anonymous.

4. Take your time when getting to know someone online. Email back and forth for a while. Chat online. See how you feel in the conversations. Talk on the phone before meeting in person. And if anything makes you uncomfortable or unsure, keep it online until you do feel sure, or say thank you and end the relationship then and there.

5. Make sure you see a photo before meeting in person. Seeing one or more photos of a match will give you a bit more insight into the person and will give you another chance to see what your gut instinct tells you.

6. Make sure all first dates are in a public place. Preferably a coffee date, so that if it‘s not a match, you can leave after a short period of time.

7. Arrange your own transportation to and from your first few dates. You’ll feel much more comfortable keeping your home address private.

8. Tell a friend about all dates. Give your friend information about your date, including a photo if possible or a link to your date’s profile. Tell your friend when and where you’re meeting your date and call when you return from your date.

9. Trust your instinct about the men and women you meet. Do so online before you meet in person and then offline too. And if you don’t trust your own gut, get a second opinion from a friend. You can show your friend your correspondence with your new matches or even invite a friend along to meet your matches in person.

10. Enjoy yourself and stick with the singles that make you feel good about yourself. This is just another way of saying trust your gut. Just like you’ll know if something isn’t right, you’ll know when a match is right. And the singles that feel right are the ones you want to meet anyway. 

Most foreign women usually live in dire economic circumstances. They are also bombarded by never ending propaganda from various media sources of a life that is plentiful and easy in the United States. This combination results in women from all over the world using any means at their disposal to obtain entry into the United States.

Since the United States Immigration has a seemingly endless list of requisites for foreign nationals to obtain a visa, most of which are difficult or near impossible to meet, these women resort to the easier path of obtaining entry via the K-1 or fiance visa. The immigration service is hard pressed to deny an American citizen a request for such visas and this knowledge is well known in foreign countries.

But who are the principal targets? Just as in any scam, these women seek out the lonely, the needy or the abandoned among men that for one reason or another have not been able to find the meaningful relationship that most others have and do enjoy. Many men in the United States have had nightmarish experiences with divorces and seek something better than their perceived jaded females in the United States. Hence they turn to searching for love and companionship via the internet. Behold they find they have numerous beautiful, kind and attentive young women that communicate with them, seemingly innocent and inviting.

My experience has demonstrated that there is usually a large discrepancy between them in age. I have often asked my clients how many 21 or 22 year old women in the United states seek them out for a relationship? Obviously the question is intended to provoke  consideration to the reason as to why a woman in the same age bracket but in a foreign country be so eager to establish a relationship with a man some 25 to40 years her senior.

Recently, an article posted in the Orlando Sentinel portrays such a relationship and gives an account of the outcome of such relationships that wind up in divorce. While reading this story, it reminded me of the number of cases that I have investigated where the men have been the victims of women who come to the United States and use our laws to circumvent the immigration process to have their own lives minus their sponsors. Interestingly, one of the ways to overcome deportation is for the woman to allege domestic violence.

There are a litany of exceptions to objecting to deportation with the most common being that of domestic violence. Most men underestimate the savvy and methodical approach that women from other countries inform themselves to obtain residency in the United States and how to preserve that once here.

My recommendation is that you do your homework first. The cost of investigating these relationships is pale in comparison to costs down the road. In either event you will be armed with the information necessary to make informed choices.

The pay phones are found all over the country, mostly in hotels and at Juan Santamaría airport. According to I.C.E., the former monopoly provider in the country, there is an established rate of 134 colones (the equivalent to $.25 USD) a minute for international calls on a pay phone.

According to the office of the Superintendencia de Telecomunicaciones de Costa Rica,the rate is the maximum that can be charged in the country. The source added that it is against rules to apply a higher cost.

BBG Global A.G. has found a way to charge more and continues to operate in the country. Because of the locations, the callers usually are foreigners, tourists, and the calls are all placed with credit cards. The caller usually does not learn of the outrageous charge until the credit card bill arrives. As local news media (A.M. Costa Rica) has reported, hotel operators and others who host the distinctive blue BBG telephones share in the income. They may not be aware of the excessive charges.

Research shows that in the United States there are two court cases pending against the corporation. The first is by a Marine and his wife who are suing the corporation because they were charged $44 when the Marine called her for four seconds from Germany. The Marine was on his way to Iraq and paid the call with his credit card.

According to information provided by the San Diego Better Business Bureau, the second case which is pending against BBG Inc. and BBG Global A.G. (both companies are the same but with different company names) is awaiting a court ruling.  However, motions have been filed in that case arguing that they are separate entities although document presented in Court clearly establish that the BBG Global A.G. is a subsidiary of the parent company BBG, Inc.

The Better Business Bureau (BBB) provided an extensive list of names used by BBG Inc., worldwide. According to the BBB there have been nearly 500 complaints about the telecommunications corporation in San Diego made in the past 36 months.

Complaints allege that consumers are being charged exorbitant  rates for international calls without disclosure of the terms and conditions prior to making the call. Some complain they are charged for calls though never connected or the call did not complete.

For more information visit the website of the BBB  and see the complaint section with regard to BBG, Inc. 

As a private detective in Costa Rica, I get this type of inquiry often:

"Hi, my name is Bill and I live in California. I have been coming to Costa Rica for the past 7 years and last year I met a woman there and we hit it off pretty good and I have been seeing no one else but her. Her name is Johanna, she is 30 and I am 59. She is Colombian and I met her at one of the local hotel/casinos. I know when I met her she was a working girl, but since we have been together she has been staying home because I am supporting her. She is attending English classes and taking other courses in the local university. Whenever I call her she usually answers the phone regardless of when I call. However, recently on certain nights I lose total communication with her. When I challenger her about it she tells me her battery was dead, or the ICE system was down or the weather effected transmission. I just get this gut feeling that she is doing something while I am not there. I come to Costa Rica every 3 or 4 months. I would like to know what she is doing when I am not there just to ease this queasiness I have in my stomach, what can I do to find out?"

Most inquires I get like this are from men who either live in the United States or Canada and are accustomed to retaining the services of a private investigator for a nominal amount of money to "spy" on their girlfriends or wives. Even their surveillance can be time consuming and expensive. Surveillance is always expensive but more so here.

First, there are no street addresses. very few men who make this type of inquiry have any clue where these women live. I usually get responses like "I've been there once but I don't remember how to get there. She usually stays with me at my hotel." Therefore the first thing that I must do is find out where she lives and this can be a real challenge. This usually requires substantial information about the target to take to the national registry and track her down by addresses she has listed as hers as well as her parents or places of employment. Alternatively, we have to watch the local haunts and spot her then follow her to her destination. People who are subjects of a surveillance are not very accommodating or considerate of your time or your wallet. They do not appear on "cue" and therefore surveillance requires patience and perseverance.

Second, once located and identified you have to be in the right spot at the right time in order to capture the activity. Once again this requires time and patience, during which the clock is running and the money is flowing.

Thirdly, following people here is challenging due to the complete disregard for following traffic regulations. Most of these women utilize taxi's and generally use the same driver for their activities. Many of the taxi drivers are quasi pimps for these women and arrange for them to meet clients away from the usual haunts.

Fourthly, it is impossible to get video of these women in a hotel room with a man. It's not going to happen. Videos will show the man and the woman at a bar or a hotel and them leaving for a room or for another venue to consummate the deal. Many clients want proof positive. With this in mind the video proof has to be viewed in its totality to come to a conclusion. My clients need to ask themselves, " What conclusion would an objective independent person who viewed the video come to?" Remember, if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and swims like a duck, IT IS A DUCK!!!!

Regrettably, the majority of these investigations leave my clients emotionally bankrupt as well as losing substantial financial resources.  

When I was little, my parents made it their business to instill in me the importance of minding my manners.  In fact, any attempts on my part to behave in any way that was deemed less than civil, resulted in my having to make amends without passing go or collecting my weekly allowance.  To them, civility, good manners and consideration for others were pretty important components of a successful life.  Experience has proven them to be right, at least for me.

Some may believe that civility is a minor consideration in today's world, especially now when we are pressured by time, having to do more with less and plagued by looming deadlines and demands.   Who has time to be polite?  Who has time to say please or thank you? And, who has time to think about how our behavior is affecting those around us as long as we’re getting the job done?

It is my contention, though, that civility has just about everything to do with creating atmospheres in which people can do their best work and businesses can thrive.

Leaders who operate from a platform of good manners and civility know that:

Everyone likes to feel acknowledged and important

I started my work life in the mailroom of an insurance company.  My job was to open mail and deliver it to its intended recipients in a department of approximately three hundred people.  Some of the department managers received their mail with good grace, responding with a well-placed thank you and a smile.  When this happened, I actually felt like I belonged, that I was doing something that had value.  It was a small gesture but always with a big result and a willingness on my part to do more for those managers who had taken the time to acknowledge my existence despite my lowly placement on the hierarchical ladder.

Successful collaboration is not possible without it.

Collaboration is a key word in today’s world.  When we work together to achieve a common, mutually beneficial goal, it is often the case that impatience will raise its’ ugly head and start goading us into saying things we might not otherwise entertain.  It is at these times when a good dose of civility is required.  Rude and self-indulgent remarks simply get in the way of achieving a satisfactory outcome.  In this context, I like what Wikipedia has to say about civility.  “Civility gives us the means to disagree without being disagreeable” That kind of says it all doesn’t it?

How they treat others will reflect, for good or ill, outside the organization

This just makes good sense.  Those who work in an atmosphere where good manners are the norm will, for the most part respond to their constituents and others, in kind.  There’s nothing complicated about that.  And, for some reason it is my guess that others are more willing to accept ideas other than their own if they feel they are being treated with respect.  Go figure.

Civility is key to building relationships and reputations through Social Media

Today, the environments we live in extend beyond our walls and borders through technology.  Every day, we send e-mails, text messages and tweets to people, some of whom we have never met face-to-face.  To me, civility is an important part of communicating with others over the Internet.   After all, when we say something on e-mail, Facebook or Twitter it gets captured everywhere.  We can’t take it back and it shapes the image we create of ourselves which can either reflect who we really are or cast a shadow over us that will be difficult to overcome

So, if I have any advice to give it would be this.  Treat others like you want to be treated.  The world is watching.

Most foreign women usually live in dire economic circumstances. They are also bombarded by never ending propaganda from various media sources of a life that is plentiful and easy in the United States. This combination results in women from all over the world using any means at their disposal to obtain entry into the United States.

Since the United States Immigration has a seemingly endless list of requisites for foreign nationals to obtain a visa, most of which are difficult or near impossible to meet, these women resort to the easier path of obtaining entry via the K-1 or fiance visa. The immigration service is hard pressed to deny an American citizen a request for such visas and this knowledge is well known in foreign countries.

But who are the principal targets? Just as in any scam, these women seek out the lonely, the needy or the abandoned among men that for one reason or another have not been able to find the meaningful relationship that most others have and do enjoy. Many men in the United States have had nightmarish experiences with divorces and seek something better than their perceived jaded females in the United States. Hence they turn to searching for love and companionship via the internet. Behold they find they have numerous beautiful, kind and attentive young women that communicate with them, seemingly innocent and inviting.

My experience has demonstrated that there is usually a large discrepancy between them in age. I have often asked my clients how many 21 or 22 year old women in the United states seek them out for a relationship? Obviously the question is intended to provoke  consideration to the reason as to why a woman in the same age bracket but in a foreign country be so eager to establish a relationship with a man some 25 to40 years her senior.

Recently, an article posted in the Orlando Sentinel portrays such a relationship and gives an account of the outcome of such relationships that wind up in divorce. While reading this story, it reminded me of the number of cases that I have investigated where the men have been the victims of women who come to the United States and use our laws to circumvent the immigration process to have their own lives minus their sponsors. Interestingly, one of the ways to overcome deportation is for the woman to allege domestic violence.

There are a litany of exceptions to objecting to deportation with the most common being that of domestic violence. Most men underestimate the savvy and methodical approach that women from other countries inform themselves to obtain residency in the United States and how to preserve that once here.

My recommendation is that you do your homework first. The cost of investigating these relationships is pale in comparison to costs down the road. In either event you will be armed with the information necessary to make informed choices.

However, keep in mind that if you can prove your spouse is spending martial funds on an extramarital affair, most judges will punish the egregious party economically during the property and settlement stage of the proceedings. Also, if your personal circumstances still necessitate the use of a private investigator, do your research thoroughly before choosing one. In almost every state, private investigators are required to be licensed or certified, but this licensure is normally not hard to obtain. Simply filling out an application and paying the fee is enough for licensing in many states. Do not think simply because an investigator holds these credentials, that they are experts in their field.

Interview the investigator you plan on using. Find out what their specialty it, what background they have in the field, and what they can do for you. Ask about the reports they produce, if they will be turning over any audio or video tape in conjunction with their investigation, and how long they generally spend investigating a subject. Someone who spends an exuberant amount of time with a suspect for the sake of receiving a higher fee is someone to avoid; likewise, someone who does not spend enough time investigating will not be able to offer you anything of substance.

This is particularly true in Costa Rica. There are people here that hold themselves out to be professional and experienced, when in fact they are nothing more than unlicensed retirees with little or no background in conducting a quality investigation. They will tout of their heroics, but when you start checking into their claims you quickly learn they are false or greatly embellished.

A typical investigation performed by a private investigator varies depending on the type of investigation you have asked for. For civil matters, the investigation in usually concluded within a week. The investigator will spend their entire week watching and recording the suspect, and will produce a detailed report listing the time and actions that took place. Video tape usually accompanies this report, so that you can see exactly what the investigator saw. Audio tape and pictures may also be attached to the report.

For more intricate investigations, the investigator can take anywhere from a few weeks to a matter of years to conclude their investigation. They may not even be able to produce results after this period of time, depending on the nature of what is being investigated. Cases like this are usually not the norm, and are reserved for families who hire an investigator to review a crime, such as the murder of a loved one, when they feel the local police department isn’t doing a well enough job.

Private investigators, as least good ones, can come at a very steep price. Their services can range anywhere from $50 to $300 an hour, with written reports and reviews of the work done costing into the thousands. Private investigators are not cheap, and should be reserved for emergency situations, or for businesses that can stand to lose a lot of money to fraud, such as insurance companies. Those who use private investigators for personal matters, such as divorce, would be better off saving their money for other purposes.
Article written by Cody Gear discussing catching a cheating spouse, he says you either need a private investigator or to become one yourself. You may not be a pro but you already have a powerful tool at your disposal.

The only way a private investigator can be considered legitimate in his or her field is to have the necessary private investigator licenses. While private investigator licenses vary depending on the state, most states require all private investigators hold at least one license. If you’re looking for a private investigator, the first thing you need to do is see what kind of licenses your state requires and then verify if the private investigator you’re looking to hire has their required state licenses.

What kind of private investigator licenses are there and why are they required?

- In Florida, private investigators are required to have a type ‘A’ license if they operate as an agency and a type ‘C’ license to be a private investigator.

- Illinois requires private investigators to hold a license stating that they’ve completed at least two years working for a licensed private investigator

- In Tennessee you’re required to get a license and have to have been trained by a qualified private investigator.

This is just a listing of a few states and their requirements for private investigator licensing. It’s important to make sure you’re dealing with a private investigator who has all the proper licenses and training, as it is the job of private investigators to always act within the law.

A private investigator license gives private investigators certain privileges, such as the ability to search for people and access to certain information data banks. By ensuring that the private investigator you’re interested in hiring is fully licensed, you are protecting yourself from punishment for hiring an unlicensed private investigator.

In certain states, it isn’t necessary to have a license to act as a private investigator. Even though a license is not necessary, it is very highly recommended by the state governments that private investigators receive the proper training and education for becoming a private investigator.

Most private investigators are required to carry their license, but if you visit their office, they should have a certificate displayed that shows they are, in fact licensed by the state in which they live and operate. This will help you to know that the private investigator that you are hiring is recognized by your state to be properly trained and of the character required to be a legitimate private investigator.

While it’s not always easy to obtain a private investigator’s license, if you are looking into getting into the field of private investigators, it is completely necessary. In many states, you can’t get a private investigators license without completing the proper training and many states actually require that you work with a licensed private investigator for at least two years.

Check to make sure your hire has a private investigator license before you disclose your personal information. Make sure your security and satisfaction will be guaranteed.

Special attention should be given to private detectives who offer services in Costa Rica. Costa Rica has no licensing requirements for private investigators, real estate agents or mortgage brokers. Chances are if you retain a private investigator or other unlicensed people, you will be disappointed in the outcome.

Cody Gear offers advice and information on a wide range of subjects, from infidelity to scams.